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Monday, July 14, 2008

Case of the Mondays

After I unpacked my office last Friday, I was feeling much better about the move that I previously bitched about. Mostly because, I'm just happy to have an office again (last week, during the move, I was without a home base and it was really disorienting), and so I listed for myself some of the benefits of the new office. They included:
  • Good parking. Because the building I've been cast away to is remote, the faculty lot is near empty and I can secure a porn star spot.
  • My office is bigger.
  • It's in the police training facility on campus, so it's incredibly secure. Lots of cadets walking around with their holsters, so any disgruntled students would think twice about attacking me there.
  • The police academy people are all super friendly and very, very polite.
  • It will be very quiet in my new office since I'm essentially in a nook that was never meant to be an office. Plus, I doubt very many students will trek out to see me, so I should be able to work in peace.
  • I'll get some extra exercise on a daily basis.
  • On my new route to the other side of campus, I discovered two neato-burrito establishments: A yoga studio and a local coffee shop. I like yoga and I like caffeine!

So, those are the positives, which I really have to try and focus on; because honestly, there are a LOT of negatives:

  • I'm in the police training facility, not the English Department. I have to walk to a different building to even make copies.
  • I don't fit in at a police training facility! They're so uniformed and polite! I mean, I am parked next to squad cars in the faculty lot! They're gonna make me pay all those unpaid parking tickets, aren't they?
  • My office is shitty. Para exemplo numero uno: View of office from the doorway.Yes, the lighting is that bad. Note "rolling thunder" -- my new rolling briefcase -- parked next to my filing cabinet, which is also functioning as a bookcase of sorts. And below is pic numero dos of my office from the inside (view doesn't improve, doesn't it?) with my craptastic desk, circa 1956.Also, chief among the negatives (and this really should count twice on the list of negatives): The distance from my classes. I estimated before that it was approximately half a mile. Well, today, I brought the Garmin, and guess what the distance was? .45 miles. I was only .05 off. Maybe I have a talent for guessing such things? Anyway, this means that the back and forth trek totalled .9 miles and it took me about 9 minutes to walk one way.
  • The distance wouldn't be so terrible, but consider two things: I have to walk this is work clothes and it is FL (thus, it is HOT) and it rains nearly every day.
  • Like today. I was just outside the building of my office when the skies darkened and the rain poured down. Thankfully, I had remembered to pack an umbrella, but still, my feet got soaked (and the Fred Rodgers' sensible shoes were squeaking) and so did the bottoms of my slacks.
  • This would have been okay, except guess what else was piled on today? The A/C was out on campus, so my classrooms, like the beauty pictured below, were about the temperature of hell.
    So, after my second class, when I felt a drip of sweat form betwixt my boobs and then roll down my stomach, I let them go early, and I packed up and went back to my crappy office -- nearly half a mile away.
  • I may need to consider keeping a change of clothing in my delightful new office.

The good news is that with the extra exercise, the extra water I'm slurping down because of the walking in the sun (and by sweating in the hot classrooms today), the nearby yoga studio and the nearby coffee place, I will be slim and trim in no time! The bad news is that I have an ear ache in my left ear. I don't think it's connected to the events of the work day. But I could be mistaken.


Kevin said...

LMAO!!!I love the quote on the chalk board:The whiskey on your breath could make a small boy dizzy.

Jess said...

Props to you for trying to find the positives! Maybe a nice run would help!

Vanilla said...

At least no one can approach from behind and see what you're looking at on your computer. Not that I imagine you'd be doing anything but work when you're there.

Marcy said...

You just need to come into work in a bikini. You'd have the students attention then, now wouldn't you? And the added perk of feeling cooler :P

RunnerGirl said...

I'm cracking up at Marcy's idea! Keep trying to focus on the positive.

keith said...

you're getting more exercise walking .45 miles to and from your office than most americans get all week. Good on ya!

You need to make up a word for between boob sweat in the tradition of swawesome.

Firefly's Running said...

Sounds like you need to do some serious decorating in your new office. I hear Pier One calling.

Anonymous said...

oh my that office is one lovely shade of puke. Sorry - I guess I should share my office space with you and we can commiserate- it's absolutely depressing- so much so I've brought candles and play reggae music so that I can pretend I'm somewhere else.

Anonymous said...

To bad your office wasn't closer to your classes and copy machine. You may have to deal with the heat, but at least you don't have to make the trek in the the freezing cold or snow.
Lastly, at least you have an office..it's better than a cubicle!

teacherwoman said...

The pros look good. Too bad they probably don't outweigh the cons.

P.O.M. said...

Do you have one of those old push button phones? That is awesome - so vintage!

The sweating part sucks the most. Can you bring 2 sets of outfits each day and change when you get to your building? Lame, but I sweat like a mofo and wouldn't be able to hang with boob sweat all day.

Lisa - Slow & Steady said...

When air conditioning is out and the buildings are the temperature of hell, I really think the kind gentlement of the police department should call foul on the English department and give you have the day off.

Ryan said...

Just be glad you aren't teaching back in Minnesota. That would be a long walk at 20 below. Also be glad you are in the same building as the coppers. If you were in the same building as the model makers we would all be ogling you.

SLB said...

WWw you have such great handwitting, all my teachers couldn't write for toffee!

Not sure I could deal with the orangy flouro glow or did you photoshop it to make us feel even more sympathetic ;-) J/K, kudos for looking on the bright side.

L*I*S*A said...

Who would have thought work could be such a workout?

runner26 said...

It's amazing what teachers have to put up with sometimes. Imagine if they put some business exec in an office a half mile from the action. It would never stand. Glad you're making the best of it.

Southern Fried Girl said...

I'm sorry but I'm peeing myself at "porn star spot" of parking. You slay me.

chia said...

Did anyone else rush the gun and go "WOW YOU'RE BY A BURRITO JOINT TOO??!?!" just to be thwarted by healthy yoga stuff?

I loves me burritos :-(

sRod said...

That sucks. All your previous complaining seems justified. Good job on keeping the positive outlook.

Jarrett said...

That strange yellow glow. Yuck!