Thursday is my long day at school since I teach a night class and I usually just stay on campus between my afternoon and evening classes in order to catch up with work. But today, without much to catch up on, I decided to get outta here for a bit and do a little shopping. Or, "browsing," I should say since I think "shopping" implies some manner of direction and I was just kinda wandering aimlessly.
While shopping, I was reminded of my love of two unattainable things: tall boots and a winter coat. Well, the first is unattainable; the second is just impractical.
See, every fall, I see the shoe stores lined with tall boots. Beautiful, tall boots. But aside from the fact that few come in my size, I can never wear these tall boots because I have such gigantor calves. That's right. The boots won't zip all the way up because of my meaty forelegs. But each year I try. I think to myself: "Self, maybe this year, the styles will be a bit wider and thus more accommodating for a generous calf like the one you possess; or maybe, who knows? Perhaps your calf is skinnier this fall than it was last fall."
So, standing there in DSW, I took my shoe off, pulled a gorgeous Nine West boot from the box, inhaled its intoxicating leather scent and tried to zip that fucker up. Could I? Of course not. If I would've tugged on that zipper any more, I would have zippered my calf-skin into the boot and I promise I would have been howling in pain in the back of ambulance instead of back here in my office telling you my boot-woes.
Damn. Another fall, and I'm no closer to fitting my fat calves into pretty boots.
That's how I found myself standing in Old Navy lusting after the cutest winter coat. Coats, unlike evil boots, always fit. And there was this cute winter pea coat with these little fake bone toggles that was just too awesome on me. And for $70? Seems like a steal, right?
Well, not if you live in a climate where a coat is not necessary. It rarely dips into cold temps here, so winter wear is totally impractical. Part of me wants to buy it for the trips we make to MN at Christmas (once every other year), but since I know we're not going this year and since I know that next fall a newer, cuter coat will catch my eye, I know that the pre-emptive purchase would be silly. But this logic didn't help lessen the lust I felt for that coat.
*Sigh.* I guess I should just be thankful that I kept all my money in my pocket instead of wishing for the purchases I just can't have.
Oh, I did buy a Nike visor for running though. That kinda made me feel better.