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Thursday, November 06, 2008

Dinner Conversation

After work today, I had a 3 miler that was pretty much the antithesis of my crappy 3 miler on Tuesday, and I finished that bad boy up in 27:36. Who knows why some runs, of the same distance and under the same conditions, can be so different from one another; I guess it's one of life's mysteries.

Anyway, after I finished running, I showered up and then Jerry and I went out to dinner to our favorite Cajun place for some beers and delicious food (he had a sausage po' boy and I had the muffuletta -- a sandwich whose name always spurs some sexual repartee). As we were waiting for our sandwiches, and whilst we were enjoying our Stella Artois, we were chatting and I was telling him about this gigantic poop I had this morning -- yes, I am a dinner conversational genius, and yes, it's a miracle I ever found someone to marry me -- and we got to discussing fruit, which led to the funniest quote of the evening from Jerry: "I like fruit; I just don't like the work that goes in to it."

He went on to explain that his ideal "fruit situation" is on a cruise's buffet where he can load up on 20 pieces of bacon and then get two strawberries and feel as though he's had his fruit for the day.

I don't know why this entire conversation bears repetition here, except that I thought it was a funny slice of "Jess and Jer Life" and fairly accurate depiction of our day-to-day conversations, but I am also a little drunk right now, so that may lend the anecdote to being funnier than it truly is. But really? C'mon, we can transition from shit to strawberries without missing a beat; that's funny.

Anyhoo...I think I may just continue the evening with more beer now that we're home. After all, Jerry has promised to play Scrabble with me, and in a few hours "The Office" and "30 Rock" are on, and what makes funny even funnier? Beer!

P.S. Jerry was just reading over my shoulder and he claims he did NOT say "20 pieces of bacon." His edit: "I said '5 pieces of bacon, 3 slices of ham, and 2 sausage links,' remember?" Sorry, I guess my powers of reportage fail me when it comes to detailing all the kinds of pig my husband can consume.

23 comments:

*aron* said...

LOL you guys are hilarious... those conversations sound very similar to our random conversations :)

Mrs. K said...

you crack me up...i'd go for 20 pieces of bacon any day...

D10 said...

I always enjoy the Jess and Jerry conversations. It makes me feel beter to know that there are others out there like me and Matt.

Erin said...

I think we live parallel lives. I agree with Jerry. I would eat more fruit if it were easier to eat (no washing, peeling, slicing, etc.).

teacherwoman said...

THat is too funny! You sound like two peas in a pod! :) LOL!

Viv said...

LMAO! That is what I do on the cruises!! Shit and strawberries just goes nicely together.

I bet you are quite the challenger on Scrabble. I would have to have you totally wasted to have hope with my 3 letter words. Have fun you 2!

MCM Mama said...

You guys are hilarious!

Shannon said...

I like my fruit easy too. Bananas are easy - peel and eat. Oranges are a pain - the peeling takes forever and your fingers smell all day. I prefer my fruit washed and cut up preferably by someone other than myself too. :)

Marci said...

THis post is hilarious!

AKA Alice said...

Maybe I'm a little drunk right now, but muffuletta and poop stories always make me giggle... so thanks for sharing :-))

Cindy said...

LOL! drunk scrabble sounds like fun...

Jamoosh said...

Stop it! You're turning me on. Muffuletta. Stella Artois. Genius!

Lisa Slow-n-Steady said...

Your random conversations are too funny.

Brooke said...

very funny. we talk so openly too...at least you didn't take a picture of it...(the poop, that is) I went to Jr. High with a girl who did that and she never lived it down..I guess the fact that I still remember it 18 years later is proof enough!

Marlene said...

Thanks for the laugh!!

I talk about poop at the dinner table too.

Wes said...

ROFL!! Getting your fruit is hard work. I prefer to get mine through beer. You know. The fruity kind ;-)

Carolina John said...

even sober, that's still funny.

Marcy said...

As long as you guys aren't comparing shits in the toilet, k? :P

X-Country2 said...

That's too funny. Although I went from craving cajun food to not so much in about one line. Thanks for that. :o)

Jess said...

Hahah I'm still laughing! You guys crack me up!

TNTcoach Ken said...

LOL, why are all the good women taken? Gigantic conjures so many images...........

sRod said...

Yup, that is average banther around the sRod household.

Laurel said...

LOL! As long as every breakfast pork is covered, I guess he is happy. With all that pork and fruit, no wonder you guys talk about poop at dinner!

You two were made for each other ;)