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Wednesday, October 17, 2007

The Game of Aggravation

I hope I am not misleading you guys into believing that the book reviews I (occasionally) write are any part of a significant job. I literally write one review about every six months and I get paid a nominal fee; so trust me, I'm no Michiko Kakutani (The New York Times chief book reviewer -- she has my dream job...ah, to be Michiko..). But, once I read "The Athlete's Guide to Yoga," I most certainly will share its most treasured advice about incorporating yoga with running, but due to reviewer's guidelines, I cannot actually share the physical book (and for those who know me, they understand that I don't share books anyway -- I am very selfish with them, sorry dudes).

Anyway, back to running...nothing new to report there. Last night, I walked the dogs with Erin and graded papers until almost midnight (had to resume the grading at 7 am this morning in order to finish and return essays to my students today). But tonight I do plan on running -- thinking of doing about 5 miles, but we'll see how I feel once I get home.

But since I don't have any running news to report, let me tell you about the new way that I annoy my husband (it's not my intention to annoy, just my nature). See, my husband is a big candy fiend, so this time of year at places like Target and the grocery store he makes his Holy Land pilgrimage and purchases enough candy to last us until Easter. This year, he added mini-packages of Starburst to the variety, and they come in little packets of two. But I only like the red kind (yeah, Wendy, you can have your "blue" flavor and I'll take my red). So, I systematically open the Starburst packages as I search for the reds, and if I don't find a red, I discard the Starburst package back into the Cauldron of Candy (you could fit a small child in there).

Last week, my husband discovered me doing this and suddenly the loose Starbursts and my habit clicked together for him. "What are you doing?" he asked, as I rummaged through the Cauldron tearing open the mini-packages and then tossing them back in. "Have you been leaving open packages of candy in the Cauldron?"

"Looking for the reds," I told him.

"You can't do that! If you open it, you have to eat the ones in there, no matter what!" Apparently, there's a rule book on eating candy that I haven't been issued.

"Yes, I can. Watch." And I tore into another mini-package, not red, I discarded it.

"Oh my God! I can't believe you! This. This. Is my new pet peeve!" he declared.

"That's fine," I told him. You can add it to the list.

19 comments:

Nancy said...

Seriously??? That cracks me up. It's totally LOGICAL to me...

I think he should probably be thanking his lucky stars he didn't get a far more annoying creature. I think throwing em back in is pretty tame. I mean, you aren't throwing them back in after you actually TRIED them, right?

I guess he's pretty serious about his candy. :D

miss petite america said...

hahahahahahahaha! reds are my favorite too! i would totally do the same thing.

and i have the exact same attitude about things when i do something that annoys someone!!!!

Wes said...

Oh, that's just so wrong! It's almost like, putting dishes in the dishwasher in the wrong place!!! Unbelievable :-)

Ian said...

I find this behavior completely acceptable. I too often do this with candy.

David said...

I guess I can see where he's coming from, but as long as only the loose (non-red) Starburst went back in, no worries. The torn open package going back in would be a bit like empty candy wrappers going back in to me.

Pretty damn funny exchange at the end! "You can't do that!" "Yes I can, watch..."

Laurel said...

Hahaha... I just read "The List" Can I ask about the biting?? OK, nevermind, I don't want to know.

I think everyone picks out the red candy. Tell your hubbs he is the weird one, not you!

J~Mom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
J~Mom said...

Sorry to delete. You can see where my brain is. Seeing as how the towels are orange they are for Halloween. You had me thinking about Easter with the candy.

That totally cracked me up!!! DH and I have very similar exchanges. Just last week he got mad at me because I bought Halloween towels for the kitchen and then told him he couldn't dry his hands on them.

ws said...

but, 'Red' is a deceptive flavor. It can take many forms. It can be apple, cherry, cinnamon whereas 'Blue' is simply 'Blue.'

If you use the cauldron for trick-or-treaters and not just your own personal candy stash those parents will be suspicious of the free floating Starbursts, I bet.

Triseverance said...

I am with you on the Reds, pink is also edible, Orange borderline and yellow.....here puppy.

Marcy said...

ROFLMAO!! You don't like the pinks? Send em my way! I *heart* Starburst and Skittles.

Paul said...

LOL that's awesome!

Erin said...

The only reason to be pissed at you is because he likes the red ones too and his odds have obviously decreased in finding one now.

I would throw all yellow ones back. Ick!

Unknown said...

Very funny.

Trust me, if all you have to worry about is pet peeves like this, you're GOLDEN!!! :)

MNFirefly said...

Oh...my...Gawd! He needs to let loose with the candy.

My Life said...

I love your lists... I share your blanket thing too. My husband won't just sleep under the normal covers. He has to push his in the middle as if he's blocking my heat too. Geez. They wanted us hot, that's what they got, right?? ;)

Mendy said...

I like the reds and the pinks too! That is a funny conversation you had. We're eating our fair share of candy these days too...

Rich said...

Well, 7 days later and he's still hanging around - you must be doing something right!

Jes said...

I'll take all your yellow starbursts! (o; Great post! (still catching up on my blog reading from being sick. lol)